Social Media is Fake!
[written 4/17/22]
It’s ironic that I, of all people, am making this post, because I love glamourizing my life on the internet, and I do it constantly. I enjoy keeping track of the memories I’ve made, and of sharing these joyous moments in that bubble we call Instagram.
And so, despite my regular posts and tangents and thoughts, I have to emphasize the following: SOCIAL MEDIA IS FAKE! So fucking fake!
One of the joys of social media is the paradigm of choice: you choose to post whatever you want whenever you want to; you choose to post the good, and to exclude the bad. Obviously you won’t post about how you got into a bike accident for the third time this week, but you WILL be posting about how often you’ve been going to the gym, because that is what you want to share with others. It’s natural: nobody purposely highlights the bad events; they won’t paint themselves out to be a fool. This means that the lens of social media is inherently very skewed: you only see everybody’s highlight reel! (And even then, these highlights were probably not as magnificent as they’re made out to be online.) But I’m sure you’ve heard this before, and hearing it from me is nothing new.
So, in reflecting upon my own social media presence, I thought I would provide examples from my own life of just how fake social media can be, as I am somebody who thoroughly utilizes Instagram’s various functions.
For one—and, really, the most obvious one to me—I AM NOT ALWAYS OUT HAVING FUN. LOL. My friends and I have very interesting conversations about this (about the way we are, and more specifically, I am, perceived on social media), because, in real life, I am somewhat of a hermit who enjoys going out to parties and on walks and to Palo Alto downtown, but is also thoroughly dedicated to her work. (Too dedicated, much of the time.) Sure, I share snapshots of my life with my friends and on my walks and at various events and whatnot, but in reality, about 90% of the time, I am probably sitting at my desk in Burbank, grinding away with a bar of chocolate next to me.
But that’s definitely not how a stranger on my social media would perceive me, and when I wrote that article about slaving away at my work, many people were shocked and surprised to find out that, most of the time, I am actually working, not out and about with friends. (It’s crazy—the illusions that social media paints of you in other people’s heads!)
In posting about Stanford, I inadvertently make it out to be this happy-go-lucky place, where rainbows are everywhere and you’re always with your friends; where you never have to actually work, because there’s just so much wonderful grade inflation! And though I do love my college and all the wonderful people I’ve met, that image is, too, a lie. I understand why people post on social media: it’s an invigorating way to reflect upon what brings you joy, and to share that joy with others. But, really, have you ever seen me post about crying over my math proofs problem set, or upset because the average on my midterm was a 40%, and I scored way below that? No! Online, you’ll never see the dark underbelly of Stanford—and of anybody’s college, for that matter—and so it is prudent to remember that everybody’s experiences on Instagram are tainted by the paradigm of choice.
Lastly, social media most definitely distorts the way we view our bodies. Now, for women especially, this is a given, something that we all hear but never internalize. Yeah, yeah, “people’s bodies in real life look way different than they do on social media.” But as someone who has posted objectively “nice” pictures of her body on social media before, I really do want to emphasize that the way people make themselves out to be online, and, more specifically, on Instagram, is fake! Behind those abs, you don’t see just how much the creator had to suck in their stomach; in that bodycon dress, you never see just how little that girl ate for lunch. With apps such as FaceTune and Photoshop, you’re able to physically alter the way your body appears, and being aware of this image distortion is key in having a sane perception of your own body.
Our bodies change and fluctuate constantly: I have posted pictures of my ab lines before because I am proud of them, but that is also the same body of mine that bloats when I eat just about anything! On social media, I can make myself appear as this incredibly fit person whose body fits every societal standard: I can appear “skinny,” I can appear healthy, I can appear strong and beautiful. Yet, in person, I can be the complete opposite: I can appear bloated—my stomach can extend far past my cleavage sometimes and that is completely okay! I wish more people would post about it!—I can appear flat-chested, I can appear “skinny-fat.” That person who has those abs that you so envy is the same person who bloats to a level that would be deemed socially unacceptable. So beware—social media bodies are fake! And, as a whole, EVERYTHING on social media is fake! Never be discouraged, because that creator’s life is probably just as regular and mundane as your own.
All in all, I hope that me telling you my deepest, darkest secrets (but not really, LOL) will encourage you to remember just how fake social media is, and that, behind that camera lens, there is a genuine person who is living and breathing and undergoing the exact same emotions and feelings as you do. They struggle too. They are not perfect, but social media does a great job of hiding these imperfections.